Emotional Education : Adoption & Oils

EMOTION EDUCATION WEDNESDAY: ADOPTION AWARENESS MONTH

Since November is Adoption Awareness month, I thought I would share a little about how our adopted and foster loves handle traditional chemicals around the house and how these things can affect their moods and behavior greatly!

Eight Novembers ago, we were totally overwhelmed and in over our heads as we were just a couple months into being the foster parents of 3 kids! When my kids first came home we would go into the bathrooms at Target or Whole Foods (yes, even WF!) after they had been cleaned and their behavior would literally break down. One would cry, one would spin out, and one would not be able to be still! The same thing would happen at home if I cleaned with anything- Comet, Seventh Generation, Mrs. Meyers! (She is one of the worst offenders at www.ewg.org btw!)

WHY DID THIS HAPPEN?

Well, there is a high correlation with kids from trauma and sensitivity to harsh solvents and industrial cleaners (and yes, many kiddos adopted at birth experience things that have coded in the brain as trauma during mama's pregnancy).

Basically, our kids' fight/flight/freeze response is engaged when they smell or are around any non-pure cleaners. Their adrenals react and they either get irritable (fight), or clown around or wiggle a bunch (flight), or they may even freeze and kind of space out.

I wish so badly that I could go back in time and tell the new-mom-Me that her kids were not choosing to act out, it was actually the only way their bodies knew how to respond to Comet or the Target Bathroom!

Synthetic "fragrance", phthalates, solvents, and most ingredients in cleaners and common household products actually can be like having real-life-culprits in our home! All kids are sensitive to them; however, because our adoptive kiddos have a more easily-triggered fight/flight/freeze response, it can be EXTRA hard for them if these kinds of chemicals are around!
One day, after some extensive training (TBRI) and learning about all of this I loaded up the Downy, the Comet, the Lysol, and all the cleaning things and dumped them all in a dumpster right away. I thought, "Dang it! I'm going to give them the best chance I can. I may not be the world's best adoptive mama, but I can get things OUT that cause them actual physical stress!"

BUT THEN WHAT CAN YOU USE TO CLEAN WITH?

Mrs. Meyers? Nope, gets an F grade rating on EEW.

Seventh Generation? Nope, gets a C-D rating on EEW.

In fact, you would be hard-pressed to find a truly clean, non-toxic cleaner on the shelves in stores.

Enter the Thieves Line. It's rumored to soon be rated on EEW, but for now I looked up every single ingredient in our Thieves Laundry Soap, in our household cleaner, in all the Thieves Home Line.

All ingredients are a "0-2" on EWG (0 is super clean, 10 is harsh and terrible)!! That is unheard of in a good laundry soap (one of the biggest irritants to our kids since they wear and smell it all day!) or a household cleaner! The Thieves line is the real deal. My kids are all up in the freshly laundered clothes pile and help me clean all the surfaces with Thieves Cleaner and never once have been triggered by the Thieves line! I cry real tears sometimes knowing what change I ended up making for my kids with Thieves!

Finally, bringing it back around to emotion-education! Sometimes when your kids are feeling "too crazy" or "acting difficult" or fill in however you say "my kids be cray" in your house, they might actually be triggered by something outside of their control.

Lets be investigators! It's empowering and it straight up makes parenting kids with different needs easier too! And thank goodness for the safety of Thieves home goods